In the 19 Century the only way to send a message to someone was through quill-and-parchment hand written letters. We’ve all seen movies from that era where a knight in shining armor reaches out to a damsel in distress by sending her a message of love; or when forbidden love arises between a maiden (promised in marriage to a future king) and a shepherd boy is cemented through love letters.

Why Write a Love Letter?

Writing is one of the oldest forms of communication and is a way to clearly organize your thoughts and convey your feelings in a precise manner. The advantage of writing is that you don’t have to worry about fumbling over your words, you can delete, erase, scratch out and rewrite what you want to say before it’s delivered to the recipient.

People love receiving letters. Why? Because it gives them a feeling of importance, that someone thought enough of them to take the time and write down what they really wanted to say. It also lends that element of surprise! Every one can attest to being elated when they receive a letter in the mail from a person they love.

A Letter of Love

Writing a love letter is different than writing any other letter because it’s personal, intimate and usually intended strictly for the person you love, not for the whole world to read. Pouring out your feelings this way can sometimes be scary because once they’re out, there’s no taking them back. But at the same time, it will help unleash all of the pent-up emotions that you have been dying to tell your Love.

The writing style of a love letter should be fluid. Following certain guidelines can help you achieve the perfect results. Award-Winning Nationally Recognized Writer Larry Barkdull has compiled a list of simple guidelines that can help anyone write a love letter well.

1. Presentation - Use beautiful stationery (a neutral, soft color, such as cream or white) and a flair pen with black or brown ink–no blues, greens or reds! Remember, your Love Letter is being written to someone special. Hand-written letters are best. This is personal–you are not writing a business letter!

2. Ambiance - Go to a secluded place and put on soft, romantic music. A quiet room would be nice. Dim the lights. Stimulate a romantic mood.

3. Keepsake - Date your Love Letter (month, day, year). This is a letter that will be treasured and remembered. You can count on it being read over and over and safeguarded in a special place.

4. Greeting - Choose an endearing salutation. Don’t be formal. Use your Love’s first name. For example: “My dearest Jennifer . . .” or “My darling Matt . . .”

5. Beginning - Start your Love Letter by telling your beloved your reasons for writing. For instance: “I have lain awake many sleepless nights trying to compose words that might adequately describe the feelings of my heart. But every time I have made the attempt, I have failed miserably. Please forgive my poor effort and accept a trite and simple phrase: I love you. I think I can say it no better than that. . . .” Never insult your beloved feelings or belittle yourself by saying something like: “I know you probably don’t feel this way,” or “You must think I’m crazy.” If you are timid in your Love Letter, your attempt at conveying heartfelt words will fall flat and might be misunderstood.

6. Body - The body of the Love Letter should include reasons for why you fell in love. Here are some ideas:

-Recall when you fell in love with him/her
-Explain how your life has changed for the better
-Describe how much you miss your love when you’re apart
-Explain that you can’t imagine life without him/her
-List some of the many things you have in common
-Tell how wonderful and complete he/she makes you feel
-Recall some special moments you’ve shared together
-Mention times you’ve picked him/her out of a crowd
-List qualities that set him/her apart from everyone else

Avoid being casual, too light-hearted, or openly erotic. A Love Letter is a letter of respect that conveys deep, difficult-to-express feelings. Don’t discount the impact of poetry in place of, or in addition to, your words. Maybe your beloved has a favorite author or poet. It will be seen as a compliment if you take the time to quote someone he/she admires. Be sure to give proper credit where it’s due. Don’t forget the Internet is a great place to find that poem or song you are trying to quote!

Be real - Your Love Letter should be a carefully crafted work of art, but it also needs to sound sincere. You want your Love Letter to make your beloved fall in love, not fall into laughter. Be confident as you express your emotions, dreams, and vulnerability.

NOTE: don’t expect your first attempt will be the letter you send. Practice on scrap paper before you start writing on your good stationery. REVISE, then leave it for a few hours, then return and revise it again. Read it again in the morning before you send it. You’ll improve it, as well as have fewer regrets–guaranteed!

7. Closing - End your Love Letter with carefully worded prose: “There, I have said it. I can rest now. And as I dream, I will dream of you.” Make your closing upbeat and positive.

8. Valediction - Don’t just end with: “Love, Eric.” Even if you said, “All my love,” it would be better. You become even more romantic by writing something like: “Dream of me, my love . . . .” What you want is a simple, yet heartfelt goodbye: “With undying love,” or “Forever yours.” Remember, you may think this is too sappy, but your loved one will treasure each word. Be prepared to have it quoted to you in years to come.

9. Insert - Include a special extra: petals from a flower, sprinkles of stars, a teabag of your favorite tea . . . . You get the idea. That little extra effort means you really put some thought (and heart) into this.

10. Neatness counts - Gently fold the Love Letter and place it in a neatly addressed envelope–hopefully, one that matches your stationery. The correct way is to fold a small stationery sheet (or sheets) in half with the text on the inside. Place the letter in the envelope with the crease at the bottom and the salutation facing the back. Hand address the envelope. Remember what your elementary teacher taught you about penmanship–make sure your love is able to read your writing! Add a stamp that looks romantic–the Garden Bouquet stamps are nice–and affix it upside down. It is a custom that means, “I love you.” Drop the letter in the mail. That’s it! Expect an emotional response. And here’s another tip: buy some breath mints–you’ll need them!

11. Be expressive - Here are some popular words to use in your Love Letter: angel, angelic, lover, giving, alluring, tempting, sensual, sensuality, seeing, tasting, touching, holding, caressing, memories, memorable, darling, gorgeous, absence, velvet, voyage, beautiful, vision, elation, blossoms, happy, kisses, innocent, passion, dreaming, delirious, temptation, complete, desire, content, embrace, rainbow, rose, adoring, stars, privileged, heart.